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I Have Had Enough — Have You? Stay Away From The ‘Program’ AA.

The Small Book — by Jack Trimpey.

Are you convinced that you have a drinking problem and need to abstain from alcohol but are finding it difficult?  Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?  How many times are you going to make the promise of change to yourself only to break that promise?  Have you had enough?  Is this AA cult religion ‘program’ doing you more harm than good?  Yes?
That is because AA is designed to keep you dependent on IT, rather than on YOU.

Not everyone needs to abstain from alcohol forever.  You know if you are best in abstinence or moderation. Sometimes, the choice changes from one to the other over time.  For either choice, The Small Book by Jack Trimpey will give you insight into how your inner voice can and does sabotage your efforts … and how to change that by using it.

You CAN trust your own thinking.  You are NOT alone.  You do NOT need to attend dis-empowering, mind-fuck, thought-stopping religious meetings for the rest of your life.  You have all the power to keep your promises to yourself and to those you love.  Start here.

The following is an example from a man who used The Small Book to help him finally find his freedom.  With permission, I share it with you.  Enjoy!  (And please, if you appreciate this, share it on facebook and wherever you share on social media.  I have had a hacking abuse situation and am no longer a member of facebook.  Thank you!)

“I found my way to a dead chat-room with a single person in it… “Sunflowerx41” I think it was…

Gunthar2000: Hello.
Sunflowerx41: Hello.

Gunthar2000: Are you in recovery?
Sunflowerx41: 10 years.

Gunthar2000: I can’t seem to get it right.
Sunflowerx41: Get what right?

Gunthar2000: The program.
Sunflowerx41: Ahhh… The program… Have you tried anything else?

Gunthar2000: I tried quitting on my own, but it never works. My whole life is a mess.
Sunflowerx41: Do you read books?

Gunthar2000: Yes I do. My favorite book is The Grapes of Wrath. I like to read stuff from that period. Steinbeck is a genius! Have you read it?
Sunflowerx41: Read The Small Book by Jack Trimpey.

Gunthar2000: What’s it about? Someone online suggested that I should read The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino. I read it, but it was too mooshy-gooshy for me. Have you read it?
Sunflowerx41: Are you drinking right now?

Gunthar2000: I’m at the library… I’m drunk, if that’s what you’re asking.
Sunflowerx41: Do you have a piece of paper?

Gunthar2000: Hold on a sec.
Gunthar2000: Got it.

Sunflowerx41: Write this down.
Sunflowerx41: The Small Book by Jack Trimpey.
Gunthar2000: Okay… What’s it like?

Sunflowerx41: It’s about quitting drinking… Have you had enough?
Gunthar2000: Yup… My life is all fucked up.

Sunflowerx41: Then read the book. It changed my life. I’ve been sober for 10 years in May. Hey listen… I have to go. The brood is acting up. I was just like you. You can quit drinking if you want to… just get that book and read it. Write it down and put it in your pocket in case you forget. I have to go. Good luck.

Gunthar2000: Thanks. What’s it about?

Sunflowerx41: I have to go.

Sunflowerx41: Bye.

Gunthar2000: Bye.

It would be another three or four years before I’d finally put the bottle down, but that day… that encounter in a chat-room… and that book have changed my life for the better.

A Vision for Me

I’m not gonna get into the specifics about how I quit drinking, because frankly, I don’t think you should give a shit. I can sum it up in two words… “Individualized Recovery.” That means my recovery is based on my needs, and nobody else’s. What I did to stop drinking is as likely to help you stop drinking as it is likely my shoes will fit comfortably on your feet… and the same goes for AA’s 12 steps.

I don’t know about you, but in my case, Bill Wilson’s shoes hurt the hell out of my feet and gave me blisters. It was like trying to walk with bear-traps on my ankles.

My point here is that there is no single method that works for everyone. We are all unique people, with unique challenges, and unique needs. Recovery depends on your ability to identify your own issues and solve your own problems. I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t use every available resource to help you identify your problems and recover from alcoholism. I’m saying that when AA hands you a plate full of shit and tells you that you have to eat it if you want to recover, it’s okay to say, “That ain’t my plate full of shit, and those ain’t my problems.”

If there were any steps involved at all in my recovery, leaving AA was the first. And so, I left AA and I recovered from my battle with booze. I was able to do this, in large part, due to that chance encounter, in that empty chat-room long ago.

Half Steps

Leaving AA was not easy for me. I’d spent the better part of 16 years or so bouncing in and out of dirty church basements looking for an answer. Although I couldn’t call anyone at AA a close friend, besides my family and a fleeting romance here and there, AA members were the only acquaintances that I had. When I told my AA friends that I was thinking about seeking outside help they quickly assured me that I would drink again. And so, I tossed around in the surf. Alcoholics Anonymous had become a mind fuck that ebbed and broke like crescent waves through my entire existence. Without those people, I couldn’t even figure out who the fuck I was. They had defined me, and I had depended on their approval in order to justify myself. The only way to be accepted was to subscribe to the doctrine. They had prescribed a one size fit’s all personality profile and told me that if I didn’t find a way to fit it I would die.

And here was this book… this little rant that introduced me to the idea that it was okay to think for myself again. I devoured that book like God eats lobster, and when I was finished, I knew that something big had happened. It felt like stepping back into my-self. Somewhere along the line I had renounced myself. I had taken up Bill Wilson’s cross and followed Alcoholics Anonymous out into the wilderness and there I found no manna to sustain. And so I left the tribe and there along my path stood a sign that read, “This Way to You.”

If I hadn’t found the answer to my drinking problem, I was sure of one thing. Alcoholics Anonymous was not helping me… it was hurting me.

“But what about those nice people… the ones who’ve devoted so much time to trying to help you?”… I asked myself.
“Surely Jack and Mary, Dave and Roy meant you no harm.”
“You were the one who failed, not them.”

And I went back, and I went back again seeking their approval… trying my best to “take what I needed and leave the rest.”

It took a while, but the truth did finally sink in… There is no “take what you need and leave the rest.” AA is all or nothing. You are either in AA, or you are out of AA… There is no in between. There is no splicing the doctrine. There is no yourself.

I left AA in early September of 2006.

September 22nd, I put the bottle down.

I haven’t had a drop since.”
—  Gunthar

Thank you again to Donald for permission to share this.  “I devoured that book like God eats lobster.”  My favorite line.  Genius!

— Laura Tompkins

16 comments on “I Have Had Enough — Have You? Stay Away From The ‘Program’ AA.

  1. That is really great Laura,

    I am fairly sure this is a Gunthar who I have encountered posting things and doing various things that helped me deprogram quite a bit.

    I like his writing style. I am wondering if you could pass on a request that I be able to post everything he wrote after the chatroom part on my site the rapevine. I want to start a section on it called “Real Hope” I think he captures the reality so well in this piece.

    if you can give him my email: therapevinenews@gmail.com

    It would be a wonderful addition to the project I am working on.

    • I will pass on the info to him and share your email with him. You are a great writer! Thank you again so much for commenting. The more traffic, the more shares (I refuse to let the program destroy words for me), the sooner people find real help and this cult religion is the small fringe cult that dies with the guru old-timers … the better.

  2. I ment to mention too that I would like to put a link to this blog on my list of bloggers.

    I have really been generating a lot of traffic every time I get a new story. I really want to sort of cross promote a lot of different folk, who are all doing things a little differently. I like the different flavors.

    I just reached out to the woman at https://aarmedwithfacts.wordpress.com/ really great writer there to…. I am almost unstopable if I use a spellcheck, and edit my writing. AA look out.

    • She is a fabulous writer. Yes! Please do put a link to my blog on yours. I must learn how to do that. It must not be that difficult. i just haven’t taken the time to do it. The different flavors are nice and powerful — kinda like a good strain of sativa. ; ) Powerless my ass.

      Thank you.

    • Would you please provide a link to your blog?

  3. Hey Laura, Ryan Lankford here. Just noticed that you unfriended me and blocked me. Whatever I said or did to offend you, I apologize. You’re one of the cool folks, and it was not my intention. Take care.

    • Oh no Ryan! I did not unfriend or block you! I am so sorry for any confusion.

      My account was hacked by steppers who proceeded to steal pictures, place nasty captions on them and post them on Facebook. I filed a complaint to facebook, and when they did nothing, my only recourse was to deactivate my Facebook account.

      You did nothing wrong. I miss communicating with you. Hopefully, the harrassment and abuse will be addressed and I will re-activate my account — although I am enjoying the facebook break. ; )

      Thanks so much for asking about this. Shows compassion and great self-care for yourself. Nice job!

      Laura

  4. Hi Laura, yes your friends miss you on facebook and I am glad Ryan reached to you so he could learn it was nothing personal. I am glad to see you are still posting and exposing AA and other 12 step programs.

    • Thank you AntiD! Now I know why you do not use your real name. These steppers are criminals! I will never stop exposing them and their beloved program. Unfortunately, Facebook has no problem with members abusing and harrassing other members and until they at least try to protect us from this type of hacking and stealing abuse, I will not participate.

      I do miss you all very much! I am also getting other work done now that I am not on Facebook. I will be back but only when I feel safe. My security and privacy settings are as strict as they can possibly be. When someone you think is safe to ‘friend’ gives an abusive stepper access to your profile, this is a violation of your privacy … Not to mention a criminal action. Last time I looked stealing was against the law. Stealing photos from Facebook and then captioning them with rude remarks is abuse … And theft. Gee, criminals in AA. Whoda thunk?! ; )

      Thanks for commenting dear.

      • It is scary how far steppers will go to squash the truth about AA/NA being exposed. They do not like it one little bit. You have played a big part with exposing with your articles etc. Thanks for your work!

        • It’s fucking terrifying. My fiancé. when the huff post article came out, used to say that we should get guns. Things calmed down after a couple of weeks but the threats coming in everyday was more than I ever imagined. They really showed their true colors and gave me a bullet train education to what this cult religion does to even perfectly decent but confused people. It’s diabolical.

          When they freak out now, and go on the attack they remind me of why this work is so important. Most people are not aware of what is going on, the healthy people listen and say something like, “I had no idea.” Steppers, or those who are close to a stepper … freak the FUCK out. (So much for happy, joyous and free!) Their anger is misplaced and extreme, but they are in a dangerous cult religion after all. I keep that in mind.

          Thank you for your work too Anti D. You have recently been a victim of their violent cyber-attacking so I know you and I are in the same place. Sometimes you gotta take a step back to recharge before heading out again. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

  5. Great post, great narrative. Loved this line, it stood out for me….”I devoured that book like God eats lobster”

  6. Here’s a smidgen of irony:

    “There are zillions of people who say that alcoholism is a disease, but not many of them believe it.”
    – Mercedes McCambridge

    And ……In a reply Bill Wilson gave when specifically asked about alcoholism as disease after he had addressed the annual meeting of the National Catholic Clergy Conference on Alcoholism in 1961 he said:

    “We have never called alcoholism a disease because, technically speaking, it is not a disease.”

    So apparently, the selfish and childish 12 step acolytes are suffering from an emotional disorder called “Munchausen Syndrome.” [LOL]

    They PRETEND to be “diseased” to get attention-to keep the spotlight on THEMselves -they repeatedly and deliberately act as if they have a physicall illness when they are not really sick.

    • Wilson lied all the time. In public he said one thing where in his plagiarized steps, at meetings, and to all the women he assaulted, he completely contradicted himself… just like a good conman should. It’s all over the “book” this sickness, this “spiritual malady” this “insanity.” No, “technically” substance use problems are not diseases but he had no trouble with the idea as long as it kept his movement alive and money rolling in from book sales.

      I really feel for Lois. She put up with his abusive crap for far too long… she should have murdered him in his sleep. 😂

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